Extracts from Facebook Page
I think most people on here are on my friends list on normal FB so will be well aware of the fact that Leicester have won the league. It has been an amazing time for me, but splattered with huge sadness that I cannot share this with Ian. Tonight I dedicate this little section to the man of my life, who brought into the other love of my life with a passion and commitment that nearly matched mine. He would have been cockerhoop today. Times like this will never be as special because of not having Ian here. But I know he is smiling his big grin up there and flying the flag. WE WON THE BLOODY LEAGUE IAN XXXXXX
Probably because of all the hype with the footie, and all that is going on, which I would normally be sharing with Ian, I am finding this week deeply emotional. The need to bring Ian back is very severe. The missing him is always there, but this week is it especially so. Maybe the realization that this is it, is finally sinking in, though I really don’t want it to be. I am doing my normal blocking ……………..thinking…………..blocking…………looking at pics..………..blocking ……………but the blocking is getting harder, hence the pain I suppose. I have an awful feeling that come a couple of weeks when things have calmed down in all areas I am going to come crashing again. However, I am prepared…………..as much as one can be I suppose! Time is actually not a healer. Certainly not yet it isnt. The need to want Ian back gets worse not better. But then why would I want it to get better anyway! Bloody bollox this widowhood lark!
The affects of losing your husband is bad enough, but with the legal rubbish associated with corrupt twats is even worse. Enough now Denise. Enough!
It all feels so unfair. I cannot get my head around the fact that ian has gone. The maths do not add up. Two plus two should equal four but it does not. The equation is wrong. Ian cannot not be here. How is that possible. I sit outside. Looking at the stars. Feeling so bereft. It is not right. It really is just not right